With the introduction of the metric system, a 69 is now 1.8.1

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My opinion

Years ago I had an interesting experience with a male hustler. For those who might not know, a hustler is a young straight man who sells his body to gay men for cash. Since the hustler is ostensibly straight, generally he will only assume inserter roles, allowing the client to suck him off being far and away the most frequent. However, for the right amount of money, nothing is off the table.

I was going around the gay pick up block downtown and spotted the hustler. Since I was looking for another gay man I didn't give him much notice. The second time around he got into my car without hesitation. He wanted to get off the street, perhaps he had issues with the police. Since I knew he was hustling I made it quite clear at the outset that I wouldn't pay him anything. But we could go to my place and have a few beers. He was OK with that. On the way there I learned that he was 32 years old and had been hustling sine he was 16, half his life. I was in my late twenties at the time.

Back at my place he saw some handicraft items that I had made. He really liked them so I gave him one. He said he was going to give it to his girlfriend. Then he said "Now I'm going to thank you." With that he took out his upper plate and gave me an absolutely mind blowing gum job, the likes of which I haven't had before or since. And yes, he swallowed. I wonder if he told his girlfriend what he did to get the handicraft item he gave her.

IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED? HAHA

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I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT GETS MAD

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.....

You have the balls, even though the do appear rather useless and small, to criticize me. Yet for the 3 weeks that you've been here, YOU have been involved with gathering subs, why? For points and attention? In the 3 weeks you've been here, YOU have posted posted 5 or 6 blogs, why? For points and attention? In the 3 weeks that you've been here, your posts in the forum are 100% abrasive, yes, even the one you directed toward routemaster, why? For points and attention?

How about this, fu@k you and the horse you rode in on!

Picture it!

My Son and I were standing in line at the bank the other day, right behind an incredibly large woman. Following in his Father's footsteps, he's become quite the people watcher, like myself. As we were standing there, my phone started beeping (my notification that I've just received a text message). Anyway, with the utmost quickness, determination and a look of horror on his face. 😮 He suddenly shoves me backwards and says... "LOOKOUT DAD! She's backing up!"

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What do prisoners use
to call each other?
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ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.
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WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?
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IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?
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IF THE POLICE ARREST A MUTE, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?

WHAT I WANT TO KNOW IS WHY, FROM BELLA TO THE LAST FOOL ON SITE, EVERYONE THINKS THAT LIX AND/OR AUSSIE IS MY MENTOR/HERO/KEEPER/MINDER/ OR ANYTHING MORE THAN MY ON LINE FRIENDS. IS THIS THE WAY YOU PEOPLE LIVE YOUR LIVES ON LINE? ARE YOU PEOPLE SO SHALLOW, SO INTO THIS CRAP WE CALL SYC/SYD THAT YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ACTUALLY ACT THIS WAY??????zzzzzzz

The top 50 worst Christmas cracker jokes ever

1. Who hides in a bakery at Christmas? A mince spy

2. What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck? A Christmas quacker

3. What's a horse's favourite TV show? Neigh-bours

4. What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

5. Why do birds fly south in the winter? It's too far to walk

6. What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsillitis

7. What did Cinderella say when her photos didn't arrive? "One day my prints will come!"

8. Did Rudolph go to school? No, he was elf-taught

9. What lies at the bottom of the sea shivering? A nervous wreck

10. Who is Santa's favourite singer? Elfis Presley

11. What did Adam say the day before Christmas? It's Christmas, Eve.

12. How many letters are in the alphabet at Christmas? 25 - there's no-el

13. Why are Christmas trees so bad at knitting? Because they always drop their needles

14. What did the farmer get for Christmas? A cowculator

15. Why did nobody bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay? They were two deer

16. What did one snowman say to the other snowman? "Can you smell carrots?"

17. Why can't a bike stand up by itself? It's two-tyred

18. What school subject are snakes best at? Hisssstory

19. What do you get if you lie under a cow? A pat on the head

20. How did Mary and Joseph figure out baby Jesus was exactly 7lb 9oz? They had a weigh in a manger

21. Which side of a turkey has the most feathers? The outside

22. What carol do they sing in the desert? O Camel Ye Faithful

23. What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to get a new fence

24. What do you sing at a snowman's birthday party? Freeze a jolly good fellow

25. What happened to Santa when he went speed dating? He pulled a cracker

26. Who's Rudolph's favourite singer? Beyon-sleigh

27. Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas? Santa Jaws

28. What athlete is warmest in winter? A long jumper

29. What's the most popular Christmas wine? "I don't like sprouts!"

30. What does a frog do if his car breaks down? He has it toad

31. Why does your nose get tired in winter? It runs all day

32. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite

33. What do you call a line of men waiting for a haircut? A barber-queue

34. What kind of music do elves listen to? Wrap

35. What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride? A Holly Davidson

36. Why was the turkey in a band? He was the only one with drumsticks

37. What do reindeer put on their Christmas trees? Hornaments

38. What happened to the man who stole an Advent calendar? He got 25 days

39. What does Santa do when his elves misbehave? He gives them the sack

40. What happened when Santa got stuck in a chimney? He felt Claus-trophobic

41. What has four wheels and flies? A bin lorry

42. How do snowmen get around? By riding an icicle

43. How did Scrooge win the football match? The ghost of Christmas passed

44. Why is it getting so hard to buy Advent calendars? Their days are numbered

45. Why was Cinderella no good at football? Because her coach was a pumpkin

46. How does Darth Vader like his Christmas turkey? On the dark side

47. What do snowmen wear on their heads? Ice caps

48. When do vampires like horse racing? When it's neck and neck

49. How does Santa keep track of all the fireplaces he's visited? He keeps a logbook

50. What does a football team do when the pitch is flooded? Bring on the subs

Vender