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Why is watching porn wrong?

Discussion Forum on Show It Off
Started by #384365 [Ignore] 11,Apr,15 13:49
I cannot understand why "porn" is frowned on. By watching we learn new techniques. this must be better than how things have always been. No one tells us or shows us how to get most pleasure from sex. Everything is hidden and never talked about if sex is seen as more open.
Yes, of course there is an age below which we do not want young people indulging in sex - their emotional age is not developed enough for a sexual relationship is often given as a reason. Clearly no one wants pornography to be a source or cause of exploitation of participants or be involved in crime such as kidnapping or slavery etc. Other these restrictions, surely seeing others having sex is very instructive.
In many parts of the world we are free to behave sexually in any way in private. Heterosexual, bi-sexual, lesbian or homosexual. Unfortunately, religion has an overpowering effect on our sexual behaviour and in some parts of the world actually removes an individual's freedom of private action.

See my other post on what SYD has done for me and read my blogs of my accounts of sex with prostitutes.
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Similar topics: 1.Watching porn together   2.Is watching Porn with a woman odd?   3.Wife watching porn   4.Too much porn?!   5.watching porn  

Comments:
By palunko [Ignore] 12,Apr,15 07:16 other posts 
who says it is wrong
By #485312 06,Aug,15 19:18
women that get bashed and strangled aren't real impressed with it lm sure *lix*


By #6568 12,Apr,15 07:39
The big problem with commercial porn is that it portrays forms of sex that are essentially perverted and often demeaning to women. ALL teen boys and young men in western countries have seen this rubbish and basically model their sexual personalities on it.

Many teens 'know' that its normal/usual to engage in vigorous intercourse with minimal foreplay and that all women like sex to finish, after a fierce pounding, with the mans semen shot in their face....... They know this because porn has taken over where sex education should be.....How else are young men going to learn about sex?
By #384365 12,Apr,15 13:26
I have taught sex education, but the content was only about our different anatomies. When we grew up neither teachers nor most parents filled us in about sex. When we married bothe we and our partners were in the dark about how to have sex and better techniques or attitudes could have helped, and we didn't discuss sexual matters with others either. However, you have picked up on a lot I missed. Yes, a lot of porn is commericiaal and staged. Women are treated as sex objects which is totally what we don't want, cruelty and **** is often evident and harmful if it affects viewers and lots of times semen is shot all over a woman's face or in her mouth and as you say there is often mch fierce painful poiunding without foreplay. Often the women are groaning and you cannot decide if it is through pleasure or pain. As you say this type or pornography is not the best example to give young men - or women. I missed a lot - mostly because I too avoid this type of content and had forgotten its effect. I agree, sex is about mutual love, gentleness and pleasure and was more thinking of this type. I was being a bit naive.
By #6568 14,Apr,15 02:37
Laurence.....no,sex is NOT always about "love" and "gentleness" etc,......its about lots of things, but they never get used/seen in commercial porn. Sex is usually about some kind of attraction between a couple and, at its best, is a communication, but in porn its virtually always portrait as something that men 'do' or take from women......it sends entirely the wrong messages to impressionable people.


By Fritz [Ignore] 12,Apr,15 02:33 other posts 
Porn is fantastic, but

- all participants should do it voluntarily
- no Family members
- no ****
- and the Access should be only for People above 20

and last but not least

- it should be part of your life and not dominate your whole life

Then it is fantastic





By admin [Ignore] 11,Apr,15 21:12 other posts 
I could think of several reasons why, but first from the top is - because of a dominance of religions based on suffering and sorrow. Sex is joy, if you have too much joy in your life you would not have a big need for god. Also, you should not think about sex, you should dedicate all your thoughts to god. Hence the attitude to sex and any kind of its depicturing. Even with religions loosing their grasp on people's minds over past 100 years this mindset will live for some pretty long time yet.


As for other comments - I do not think porn is particularly bad for young people.

1. People lived most of their history nude, urinated in front of their living (yes, I happened to see an amazonian tribe village, it stinks, literally) and fucked in front of their chi1dren, since they lived in one room, often even more than one family. So I do not think watching porn is any worse than that. Even if chi1dren see it, still not that bad, though I'm indeed against such exposure.

2. Only couple of past decades TV is censored. Before that even chi1dren were exposed to all kinds of vio1ence on screens. Youth even more so. Do you remember action b-movies of 80es? Yet people live and do not kill each other. No one learned to live like it was in those movies. Actually, I notice that my generation and following exposed to those movies tend to be less violent than the ones who were 10 years older. So why people would learn relationship from porn?

3. You probably know that Indian culture spawned some great texts about sex. Most known is "Kama Sutra". A woman is seen as a respected partner in them. Yet many women could experience how rude and disrespectful with them Indian men are on this very site.

My point is - porn itself does not make men worse than they are. Those people who are stupid and brutal would be stupid and brutal in sex with or without watching porn. And those who are gentle and sensitive would not be spoiled by watching porn anyway.


P.S. I think I've seen some statistics that show that in countries where porn is legal sex crime is lower than in those where it is not.
By #85103 11,Apr,15 21:25
I understand what you're saying, but the kind of 'newer' porn with bad role models for young people I mean is the (fake) r@pe and extreme stuff, particularly the stuff that's made deliberately to look like it was recorded on a mobile phone.
I agree, porn doesn't make men worse than they are, but most very young men think with their c0cks and forget all about the fact all the acts they see in porn are consentual between the 'actors' and not reality.
By admin [Ignore] 11,Apr,15 21:50 other posts 
I'm not sure why you refer to r@pe fantasy as "newer" porn. It's banned all over the world for a least 10 years already. If you can still find something like that on the net today it's a poor shadow of what once was. Back in 2000-2003 it was all over the net. And I even knew couple of guys who ran such paid sites. You may be surprised but according to them their sites had 3-4 times higher percentage of female members than ordinary porn sites. I mean, it was almost about 35-40% when on ordinary paid porn sites females are rarely more than 10%. Yes, I'm saying that women liked those sites more than any other kind of porn, no matter what they say out loud.
By #85103 11,Apr,15 22:11
Wow! You're right, I am surprised to hear that about women and those sites! I've never actually had a conversation about porn with any women, to be honest.
I have a strong dislike for the "daddy and son" roleplay porn! I've had messages from young guys on this site saying "Hi daddy". It creeps me out!
By admin [Ignore] 11,Apr,15 22:36 other posts 
I guess this "daddy" thing is the same as "master and servant" thing. I also happen to know several people who are into BDSM, they say it's hard to find a master, most of people in that circle want to be dominated.


By #485312 11,Apr,15 18:50
its because its not real, its usually shows violent unrealistic sex that isn't what a relationship is made of...the porn industry caters to mens fantasies and lve notice since the invent of the net, men are disrespectful, rough, violent and think that all women are tools to be used like the visions they have seen online...l know girls who don't ever want sex because it looks so bad to them and l don't blame them, the net doesn't show the love between two people, the trust and respect you need to give your women to build her confidence, sex should feel great for everyone, not just the misogynists and arseholes getting a cheap thrill at the expense of someone elses feelings and emotions...the next generation is going to have a hard time keeping their marriages together if this is what young men are moulding their sexual preferences around...*lix*


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