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You are not alone, it reads like some form of code. Perhaps the original poster could translate it into plain English plus give us an update as to how his experience with the cougars went.
Or even a derivation of the Navaho dialect and we need a windtalker to understand it.?
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It is no different than any other colloquialism or regional slang.
hmu = hit me up = contact me
chill = hang around with = relax with
Oil = a very good looking man
Urban Dictionary:
Oil
A very good looking man. Mostly used within male conversation to point out a good looking man, in a manly fashion (as if to point out competition). Often has a very good sense of fashion and more often than not is jacked/ripped. When describing an oil, one can be referred to as 'oily'.
I was crucifying my guns in the gym the other day, when this colossal oil walked in, just pulling birds with his stare.
Oi chief, oil at 12 o'clock. We may have trouble slamming these birds.
Oi = Hey
[Translation of line above: Good looking guy straight ahead. We may have trouble picking up on these girls...]
It's not so much a mangling of the English language as it is us 'blokes' are 'out of step'. The language of youth today is no different now as it was when we were young, and likewise our parents and older adults did not understand what 'groovy', 'cool', 'hip' meant.
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