Want a bigger penis?
Enlarge it At Home
Using Just Your Hands!

Get Paid For
Using Social Sites!

Tired of ads
on this site?

Laughably Small Penis?
Enlarge it At Home
Using Just Your Hands!

TELL US SOME CORNY JOKES

Discussion Forum on Show It Off

Page #1

Pages:  #1   #2  

Started by routemaster [Ignore] 19,Aug,18 23:57  other posts
I told my doctor I had a phobia about hurdles. He told me I just needed to get over it.

* * * *

I once had a job digging holes. It was really boring.

* * * *

New Comment       Rating: 0  


Comments:
By #551147 22,Oct,18 04:02
What's the difference between light and hard?

You can s.l.e.e.p with a light on... 😉

REALLY! S.L.E.E.P. is cesored...
By kebmo [Ignore] 24,Oct,18 00:55 other posts 
Asleep is not.
By leopoldij [Ignore] 27,Oct,18 15:16 other posts 
Sleeping
Asleep
Sleepless
Lesssleep
Sleepy
Sleepful
Sleeplessness
Sleepwalker

Sisterly
Stepsister
Sisterhood
Sistrring
By leopoldij [Ignore] 21,May,23 20:08 other posts 
Sleep


By routemaster [Ignore] 17,May,23 19:54 other posts 
Bloke went to the doctor and the doctor said: "Hello mate, not seen you for a long while."

"No," replied the bloke, "I've been ill."

By CAT [Ignore] 21,May,23 15:45 other posts 
🤣🤣


By routemaster [Ignore] 20,May,23 21:02 other posts 
A large wall mirror, believed to be stolen, was left outside New Scotland Yard in London last night. Police say they are looking into it.
By CAT [Ignore] 21,May,23 15:45 other posts 


By CAT [Ignore] 09,May,21 07:44 other posts 
squirrels
The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrel infestation. After much prayer and consideration, they concluded that the squirrels were predestined to be there, and they should not interfere with God’s divine will.


At the Baptist church, the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistry. The deacons met and decided to put a water-slide on the baptistry and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim, so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.


The Lutheran church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist church. Two weeks later, the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water-slide.


The Episcopalians tried a much more unique path by setting out pans of whiskey around their church in an effort to kill the squirrels with alcohol poisoning. They sadly learned how much damage a band of drunk squirrels can do.


But the Catholic church came up with a more creative strategy! They baptized all the squirrels and made them members of the church. Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.


Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue. They took the first squirrel and circumcised him. They haven’t seen a squirrel since.
By tb1 [Ignore] 21,May,23 14:49 other posts 


By thebeewolf [Ignore] 09,May,21 12:46 other posts 
You should never challenge death to a pillow fight...unless you're prepared for the REAPER CUSHIONS!


By CAT [Ignore] 06,May,21 06:49 other posts 
A guy walks into a bar and sees a drop dead gorgeous woman sitting at the bar. He sits himself next to her and buys her a drink. She smiles and opens her legs. He can’t believe his luck. He starts to move his hand under her skirt. She smiles, reaches inside her bra and takes a note out. She hands it to the guy.
Note says, when you get to my balls, don’t scream. I’m Elliot Ness under cover.


By routemaster [Ignore] 06,May,21 05:59 other posts 
What do you call a female impersonator who also writes murder mysteries?

Dragatha Christie




By leopoldij [Ignore] 03,May,21 02:08 other posts 
"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.


By PSerect [Ignore] 03,May,21 01:36 other posts 
Good forum topic. I want to appologize for my inappropriate comment. Im sorry if anyone was offended


By Louis [Ignore] 01,May,21 06:42 other posts 
THIS JUST IN: A cement truck has collided with a prison bus. The prisoners have escaped. Residents are warned to be on the lookout for fifteen hardened criminals!
By bella! [Ignore] 02,May,21 20:53 other posts 
That is CORNY!


By PSerect [Ignore] 02,May,21 20:17 other posts 
Whats the difference between a lesbian and a canoe?

Lesbians dont tip
By bella! [Ignore] 02,May,21 20:53 other posts 
Okay.


By #275407 29,Apr,21 18:14
While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 15 miles per hr over) I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge. Naturally, he pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me,"what's the hurry". I replied, "I'm late for work". Oh yeah, said the cop. "What do you do". I said, "I'm a rectum stretcher. The cop said "What"... A rectum stretcher? What does a rectum stretcher do". I said, ""well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand. Then I work until I get both hands in there, and then I slowly stretch it until it's about six foot wide. The cop asked me, "what the hell do you do with a six foot asshole?. I simply replied, "you give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge......" Bail $100 ticket$95. Look on cops face, priceless
By HotFuckerBoy [Ignore] 29,Apr,21 18:34 other posts 
Hahaha good one


By #545732 10,Nov,18 15:07
A guy walks into a bar with a giraffe. The guy has a pint and then they go to leave the bar when the giraffe suddenly collapses and drops to the floor. The guy carries on walking to the door and the barman shouts, "Oi! You can't leave that lyin' there!"
The guy replies, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe."


Two fish in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"


...sorry


By #275407 22,Oct,18 02:14
One day a man, who has been stranded on a desert island fo over ten years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon. "It's certainly not a ship." He thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, or even a raft. Suddenly, emerging from the surf comes a drop dead gorgeous brunette women wearing a wet suit and scuba gear. She approaches the stunned guy and sais to him, "tell me, how long has it been since you've had a cigarette?" "Ten years," replies the stunned man. With that, she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes, he takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and sais, "man oh man! Is that good". "And how long has it been since you've had a sip of bourbon?" She asks him. Trembling the castaway replies, "ten years." She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, and pulls out a flask and hands it to him. He opens the flask and takes a long drink and says, "wow, that's absolutely fantastic." At this point she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man seductively and asks, " and how long has it been since you've played around?" With tears in his eyes, the guy falls to his knees and sobs, " oh sweet Jesus! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there too?"
By #551147 22,Oct,18 03:54
By #545732 27,Oct,18 18:54


By #570258 24,Oct,18 14:32
Q: How do you get a small dog to quit humping your leg??


A: Pick him up and suck his dick.



By #551147 23,Oct,18 14:06
In light of the season upon us...

What did the Jewish p.e.d.o.p.h.i.l.e. say to the lil boy?

C'mere lil boy! Gimme some candy...


By cthulu70 [Ignore] 12,Oct,18 07:07 other posts 
A man was washing his car with his son, when they were done his son says " dad couldn't we have used a sponge? "
By leopoldij [Ignore] 20,Oct,18 05:08 other posts 
Good one!


By #569242 11,Oct,18 18:25
What's pink and has 7 little dents in it?


Snow White's cherry!


By leopoldij [Ignore] 11,Oct,18 17:57 other posts 
Q: How does a woman scare a gynecologist? 
A: By becoming a ventriloquist!
By #545732 11,Oct,18 18:04
By leopoldij [Ignore] 11,Oct,18 18:10 other posts 


By leopoldij [Ignore] 11,Oct,18 17:57 other posts 
A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis, her mom said you should have asked me last night it was at the tip of my tongue.


By leopoldij [Ignore] 11,Oct,18 17:55 other posts 
Boy: "Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind, it's too long." 
Girl: "Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nevermind, you won't get it."


By cthulu70 [Ignore] 11,Oct,18 17:51 other posts 
I got a dog from a blacksmith, when i got him home he made a bolt for the door


By #569242 11,Oct,18 16:34
What's pink and has 7 little dents in it?


Snow White's cherry!


By routemaster [Ignore] 09,Oct,18 01:04 other posts 
Did you hear about the clairvoyant that got knocked down by a car? She didn't see it coming.

****


By routemaster [Ignore] 15,Sep,18 04:56 other posts 
I went to the chiropodist the other day and the woman made a joke about one of my little toes. I thought, blimey that's a corny one.

*****


By #545732 14,Sep,18 03:20
A guy goes for a pee and is shocked when the pee sprays out in different directions from some holes that have mysteriously developed along his cock during the night. He's too embarrassed to mention it to anyone and suffers with the problem as best as he can over the next few weeks until he finally builds up enough courage to see a doctor about it.

Doctor: Ok, what can I help you with today?
Guy: Well it's a bit embarrassing to be honest, doctor. I seem to have some new holes on my penis and it's causing me so much trouble as you can imagine. I've been worried about it for weeks now and I'm hoping you can help me, please?
Doctor: Hmmm, interesting. It's something I haven't come across before. Ok, let's have a look and see what we can do.

The guy lowers his trousers and the doctor examines his penis for a few moments, then writes a note and hands it to the guy.

Doctor: Give this man a call. I'm sure he'll be able to help you.
Guy: Oh, is he a specialist in problems to do with the penis, doctor?
Doctor: No, he's a clarinet player and could probably show you how to hold it properly.


I'm here all week, folks!


By routemaster [Ignore] 14,Sep,18 02:46 other posts 
I met my wife at an orgy. Funny, as I thought she was at her s i s t e r ' s in Scunthorpe.

* * * *

A l a d y f r i e n d of mine loaned me a waterproof sheet.
I said: "Ta Pauline."

* * * *


By #61033 29,Aug,18 13:40
How do you circumcise a whale?
Send down four skin divers...


By #551482 29,Aug,18 12:57
A large hole has appeared in the middle of the Main Street.

Police are looking into it


By kebmo [Ignore] 28,Aug,18 18:46 other posts 
Who’s do you call to clean the ocean?

Mermaids


By Sickboy [Ignore] 28,Aug,18 18:21 other posts 
A nurse pulls a thermometer out of her pocket and say's "some arseholes got my pen"


By #551482 24,Aug,18 16:11
I wrote to my mother and said I´d grown another foot

So she knitted me another sock


By routemaster [Ignore] 23,Aug,18 03:05 other posts 
Did you hear about the chef who got annoyed when nobody liked his latest recipe?

He had a chip on his shoulder.

* * * *


By #358797 23,Aug,18 02:35
Two fish run into a concrete wall.
One turns to the other and says "Dam."


By kebmo [Ignore] 22,Aug,18 22:39 other posts 
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

Snowballs


By leopoldij [Ignore] 21,Aug,18 21:35 other posts 
Question to all:
Why is there a gate around cemeteries?
By Ravioli_Max [Ignore] 22,Aug,18 02:22 other posts 
Why?
By leopoldij [Ignore] 22,Aug,18 06:23 other posts 
Because everyone is dying to get in.
By Ravioli_Max [Ignore] 22,Aug,18 17:38 other posts 


New Comment   Go to top

Pages:  #1   #2  



Show It Off